When things come up that are stressful, our bodies react. As I look at people around me, I feel like everyone is dealing with life pretty well. Then I look at my own life and wonder how the heck is anyone functioning at all? My house is a mess and it's all I can do to get my kids where they need to be. More often than not, dinner is a "fend for yourself" kind of affair. It's not how I pictured my life, but it is what it is.
Recently, my youngest daughter had her appendix rupture and boy was it a crisis. My focus was completely on my daughter as I spent nine days with her in the hospital. It was so stressful. There was hardly any sleeping happening and it was terribly sad to see my sweet, six year old girl suffering so much. Not only was she in the hospital, but it was over Christmas, so my husband, Jeff, and our four other children were home for Christmas without us. Jeff and I were video chatting on Christmas Eve as I instructed him to know who's presents were who's so he could get things ready. It was pretty funny but he did a great job making Christmas special for our kids.
Three weeks after my daughter's surgery, life is still hard. We are still not getting enough sleep, and it is a very slow recovery. Quite the emotional rollercoaster.
As I sit and think about the last few weeks, I am wondering how my chronically ill body has survived. Of course my focus has been with my daughter and all my other kids, but I can't believe my body hasn't completely shut down. It's amazing, really, that I am still functioning. I know God is healing my body and it's a wonderful feeling. Sure, I've been tired and sure, I don't have much motivation, but I am able to take care of my family and I even made it back to work this week. Little by little I can see my body getting stronger and able to deal with stress slightly better. Had this happened last year, I don't think my body would have been able to handle it.
I will take the small steps forward and try to be patient with my sluggish body. Hoping that I can be there for my kids, emotionally and physically, when the next crisis arises.