So I have a problem. Before I put anything out in the world, I feel like it has to be perfect. I over edit, over analyze and over critique myself. That attitude has held me back a time or two...or a hundred. As I have pursued different goals, I find myself hiding behind my imperfections. When my friends try something new, of course I encourage them to go for it...right now. Don't wait, who cares that you aren't where you want to be at this moment, do it anyway. Who cares if it’s not perfect. It’s not so easy taking my own advice. Back when I was recording my music demo, I was struggling with health issues. Not only was I feeling worn down, but I had gained some weight. I was not at the size I wanted to be. As I got an opportunity to record a music video for one of my songs, I wasn’t happy with the way I looked, and almost turned it down until I was feeling better about myself. As I found myself getting my hair and makeup done for the music video, I was proud of myself for going for it. Not many people knew what I was struggling with, the video doesn't show a sick person. It was hard. But I did it. Every time I watch the video I'm reminded that I need to be vulnerable and put myself out there, even if I'm not in a perfect place. Because let's face it, perfection isn't real. It's important that we share who we are, even if it's not our best. We can relate more with each other when we just show up as we are. Sure, I would love to lose 30 to 40 pounds, quit getting adult acne, feel happy all the time and so many more things. But I've finally decided that if this is as good as it gets, then I have to find a way to accept it. Some days that's easier than others. Let's celebrate our imperfections and love each other for trying. Here is a link to my music video "Letting Go" which was originally written about a relationship, but with what I've gone through, it's more about me letting go of my old, healthy self, and accepting who I am today. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_FpYz8jesg
