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Wallowing in Self Pity

I had planned to write a light hearted or funny post this week. Our week has been anything but funny and light hearted.

My oldest daughter is dealing with a lot right now one of her fiends lost her brother. Even though I didn’t know the family well, it was such a shock and has been very emotional.


Also, our dear sweet puppy got hit by a car and even after rushing him to the vet, he couldn’t be saved. Now if you aren’t an animal person, you probably don’t know how hard our family is taking his loss. We all have cried a lot.


As I miss our sweet dog, I can’t imagine how the family is coping, who just lost their son and brother.

I keep thinking life is going to get easier and, as my health improves, that we will just have to worry about what face cream to use and what to have for dinner. I keep longing to have a boring, more normal life, like I assume other people have. But I’m sure if I really knew what people were dealing with, I would realize that everyone is going through more than they want to.


I was feeling so down today with all the heaviness surrounding me. I haven’t been quite myself the last few weeks. Part of that has been because I’m not feeling good but I think the other part is I’m terrified of relapsing. Depression is creeping in and I have been angry and short tempered.


While wallowing in my self pity I was listening to Lauren Daigle’s music to get me through my workday. Before one of her songs she was talking about how God’s love replaces all fear. That hit me. I’ve been trying so hard to control everything in my life, trying to make things better and getting so frustrated when I can’t. I forget sometimes that I need to just do my best and trust God. I will work on that and hopefully, the sun will shine again soon, the rain isn’t helping my mood!


This is a link to Lauren Daigle doing a Q&A session and I loved what she said.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4Bp09gJ6hs

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